Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Portland's Best from ON MY OWN

   Portland's Best have had their share of troubles, especially when they shoot civilians that are innocently brandishing knives and guns pretending that they want to kill somebody.  And of course, there's the occasional "suicide by cop" candidate... every Officers nightmare!  Personally, I'm glad enforcers are out there doing what they do for me and NOT having to do what they do, for myself (this almost sounds like the lyrics to a song.  Maybe I need a song lyric blog, too).  OOPS!  I digress.
   There's no place in the world however and I haven't done my research, where you can witness a mounted Officer riding a horse with a PUNK buzz cut!  Even the horses are HIP in this city!  My suspicion is that they can also talk just like MR. Ed, because when I approached a dismounted Police Officer, she was up by the horses head, his lips were moving and the Officer was talking back.  They were whispering very quietly though and when I got close, they both just gave me "attitude" typical of enforcer mindset like I was the one acting suspiciously!  All I wanted was a few pictures of the horses butt.  What is suspicious about that?  For all the Officer knew, I could have been a concerned Proctologist, checking out a potential lead on a new patient.  I'll elaborate on that later when I do the post on Portland Proctology.
   I have no idea why the horse had such a unique looking shave but, I was impressed, not scared.  It was admittedly sophisticated and maybe done in the vain of the new Super Hero era, where everyone in the crime-stopping business needs a "LOOK."  However, the shoes were the pièce de résistance!  I love shoes and I was certainly excited about the hoofwear... subtle, but making a definite fashion statement.

  Secondly, I have to make a statement about the Portland Police cars.  You've heard of glow in the dark but these cars ROCK!  I'm talking nuclear.  The phosphorescent glow in the rainy fog of a Portland winter night is a real show stopper.  Especially, when The Presence is a big one like Occupy and the campers are being forced out of the muddy, rain soaked park across from City Hall around midnight!  That's when the brightest and best glowers are pulled out of the garage and roll down the street in all their magnificent splendor!  A true sight to behold!  It's NEON to the Nth degree!  You just gotta love it!

... and wouldn't ya know it, there's a Starbuck's in the background!

Anyway, I just couldn't feel safer anywhere else and so, I remain ON MY OWN in Portland OR.

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